Monday, 23 March 2020
Wednesday, 18 March 2020
Fathers Day here in Spain, Italy and a number of other courtries...
Happy Father's day to all good dads out there.. Or at least, as happy as it can be with the difficult situation the world is in at the moment..
It really is so difficult and the emotions heighten even more on key dates.. Even more so with what is going on at the moment..
I'm sure many alienated parents, like me, worry about mortality from time to time.. What if something happened to me?
Who would care enough to make sure my daughter is ok and also to make sure she knows how much I have tried for so long to be in her life?
Who would care enough to let her know who I really am.. Not the person her mother has portrayed me to be in order to tactically remove her from home in Spain and erase me and my family from her life?
What if anything happened to our daughter? Would I even be told? I have to play a detective role to find out anything about her.. It is so damn cruel.. Enough is enough.. Imagine how this behaviour might impact our child not only in childhood but also into adulthood!
Please don't forget that parents who cannot see their children due to abduction and /or alienation ARE still daddies or mummies on these days.
The difference being that it cannot be acknowledged by the children that they love with all of their hearts...
Thoughts with all affected parents, grandparents, families AND of course, their children.... One day closer x
#fathersday #kidsfirst #parentalalienation #parentalchildabduction #onedaycloser
Sunday, 1 March 2020
Monday, 30 December 2019
Wednesday, 25 December 2019
Thursday, 12 December 2019
Sunday, 18 August 2019
Next Sunday will be Aleyah's 14th birthday.. Yes 14! As we have done every year since she was taken, we will be trying to celebrate the day as much as possible and keeping cards and messages from friends and family for her to read when we are reunited. (let me know if you want a message from you kept for her).
We keep all messages etc in a memory chest for her so she will be able to see for herself that she is, and has always been in our minds and in our hearts. We will also, of course, have cake 🎂😉.
Next year, we plan to do another "Across Borders" event which Michelle is crazy enough to make the journey with me to help to raise awareness of parental child abduction and parental alienation.. and hopefully raise some funds for one or two worthy charities (TBD) .. Guess some more training is in order..
Thanks Michelle Clark and others who have stood by me, given your support, spoken up instead of just thinking how wrong this has been and those who have helped and supported these events and activities. Also those who have sent or posted messages of support. They all mean so much xxx
I have some amazing friends and family who I love and appreciate so much. You have helped to keep me strong, and smiling even when I have found moments so difficult.
We are one more day closer.. There will be an end to this madness.. Always loving you.. Forever your dad xx
#nevergiveup #onedaycloser #foreveryourdad #walkacrossborders #tandemacrossborders
Saturday, 3 August 2019
Wednesday, 24 July 2019
The tactics used to keep us apart have been dispicable.. This will come to an end. One day she will seek the truth I am sure.
When she is an adult, she won't be able to be controlled in the way she is now and decisions made for her. I have maintained a record should she seek these answers.All I wanted was to be in my daughter's life but every tactic possible has been used to try to stop that from happening.. All because I dared to instigate Hague proceedings for her return home after she was taken a decade ago.
Saturday, 13 July 2019
Thursday, 11 July 2019
Sunday, 7 July 2019
Saturday, 22 June 2019
Let's get voting every day on Facebook and twitter for our talented friend Shani Ormiston. 🙂You can vote every day until the 7th July x
Click on this link to vote 👇
Monday, 10 June 2019
How many target parents (parental child abduction/parental alienation) will have to go through the totally flawed family court process at such a huge cost emotionally, financially & sometimes physically?
In many cases their lives are systematically destroyed not only by the abducting/alienating parent but also by the authorities they try to trust to protect them & their child.
Their character is subjected to an unjust & unfair battering which facilitates the abusive & narcissistic behaviour & totally fails the children as well as the target family.
These target parents continue to go through this process in the hope that THEY will be the one case that is different.
There are some success stories (if you can call them that as the child loses out as soon as alienation tactics commence) but more often than not, the target parent seems to hit one brick wall after another as if it is engineered to sap the life of a loving parent with the objective of pushing them to the point where they cannot go on any longer. It's a very profitable and accepted emotional abuse.
I'm not convinced at the moment that there will be any real change unless there is a system in place to identify, deter and provide accountability for these heinous emotional abuses. Will this happen? I suspect not because conflict in the family court is such a profitable business so is often encouraged by some devious and immoral lawyers and court "professionals"
I plea for the day where courts act on the deceptive, dishonest & abusive "tactics" that seem to repeat over and over again which I am convinced they are aware of.
We will keep on hearing these nightmare stories where the system has failed parents & children. When will it end?
If you found yourself facing this, what would you do? Imagine you woke tomorrow & found that your partner/ex-partner had internationally abducted your child. What would your first action be if reasoning/mediation was not possible due to the mindset of the abducting "parent"?
What if such heinous and false allegations were made against you in the family courts and they were simply accepted despite your pleas to investigate fully?
What if your child was coached and brainwashed to reject you and your family? Who would you turn to?
If you are in a position where you have been absent from your child's life through alienation tactics for a long period of time, how would a parent help the child through the reunification process? Who can they turn to for help?
So many questions... So few answers.
I am a naturally positive person. I always have been.... But... I have to admit that I have never been so disillusioned with so much in this crazy circus.
So much so, that I have felt the need to distance myself from organisations and groups that advertise as wanting to promote awareness and change.
I've found that I have lost the will to write on the subjects anymore because it's all been said before.
Even trying to read articles from knowledgeable people I have found that I am starting to switch off to because once again, it's all been said before with very little change.
I have lost the enthusiasm to organise anything or even participate in anything at the moment that attempts to raise awareness of pca / pa because each time I try, it seems to be met with apathy even from the organisations I am trying to assist...
After almost 10 years of trying to do something positive in such a difficult situation I have to be blunt and honest about this because it's how I feel.
In my own situation, I've been patient because I have had to be.
I was gagged until the point that I lost faith in the court system to be a mechanism to help to resolve the situation and help to reunite my daughter with her paternal family. I now post quite freely because the only way it seems to get to tell my child how much she is loved and missed is through social media..
That I will continue to do as it is so important for Aleyah to know that she is always in my heart and in my mind.
I will continue to visit the school often and find out as much information about her progress as possible..
She is almost 14 now so there is a few more years left of "being patient" but at that point, I am still not sure how to approach reunification.
I have reached out for advice here so many times but have simply been ignored.
Aleyah will have to deal with the fact that she has been lied to and betrayed for so long as tactics to keep here away from her paternal family or she may refuse to be reunited and believe the alienation tactics that have been so venomously used.. How do I help her with this?
Over this 10 years, I have been given promises and words of hope from lawyers, advocates, groups and organisations but still, I am only closer through time.. Not through action or help.. Its frustrating..
I am sure many of you feel similar despite trying to gloss it over with positivity.. I wish you all well.. I really do, but for now, I think I need to step back a little
One Day Closer x
Sunday, 26 May 2019
There was a comment on a group recently about feeling guilty about posting a picture of you smiling when having to cope with not seeing your children due to parental child abduction and/or parental alienation.
It's so important to keep strong and focus on other parts of your life that keep you as happy as you can be.. Dont feel guilty for smiling!
Your child needs the parent they had.. Only stronger.. Not a broken shell of the person you once were.. Its tough I know.. We all will have our moments where the situation overcomes us and the tears are flooding.. But remember, our children may feel guilt for being controlled in the way they may have been..
They will want to see a happy, strong parent that they can return to whether it's tomorrow, next week, next year or in the future.. One day closer x
#parentalchildabduction #parentalalienation #onedaycloser #lovehome #lovespain
Sunday, 21 April 2019
I put this video together to help to raise awareness of parental alienation for Parental Alienation Day on 25th April 2019.
It has been almost 10 years since I have been able to spend any time with my daughter. I hope she remembers the first 4 years of her life when she was home in Spain.
I will never give up on my child and look forward to the day we are reunited. One Day Closer xx
#kidsfirst #onedaycloser #foreveryourdad #parentalienationawareness #nevergiveup #kidsfirst
Tuesday, 19 February 2019
I aim to do everything I can to raise awareness of issues related to pa / pca and let my daughter know how much she is loved and missed... Also to continue to plea to the maternal family to just do the right thing for Aleyah... We are one day closer xx
#parentalienationawareness #onedaycloser #foreveryourdad #kidsfirst ALWAYS loving you.. ALWAYS thinking about you.. FOREVER your dad.. Xx #aleyahmonkdalton (aka stage/alienation name #aaliyahmonk)